Identifying and Uncovering Your Fears
“I was surprised at how me (and my body) at the appropriate time knew just what to do to help me through! Along with gas and air! And now I have an amazing baby boy … who’s not so much of a baby anymore as that was nearly 20 months ago!“
Emma Lindsay Fitzsimmons
The Birth ROCKS process of releasing your fears involves first and foremost being honest with yourself and your partner and examining what you are afraid of. Discuss this with your partner at length. Once we have identified our fears, then we can face them and identify how tension presents itself in your body. We can begin to consider ways in which we can lessen or minimize these signs of tension.
We can then move on to looking those fears in the eye, being completely honest about what they are and how we can deal with them. Your Birth ROCKS Mentor can help you use different techniques to get these fears out in the open, but you can begin by considering the following:
Tackling Your Fears ‘Head On’
Don’t run away from or try not to think about the things that scare you about giving birth. I am not telling you to ‘dwell on’ things that may never happen which is just as counter-productive and I am not asking you to over analyse, but I am saying, let’s be honest (there it is again) about your fears. Let’s not shy away from them, let’s take them on, challenge them and see what we can do to resolve them. To begin, ask yourself these questions:
• What are you really scared of?
• Why are you scared of this?
• Is there any reason why this should happen?
• What is the worst that could happen?
• What can you do to make yourself feel better about this?
• Whatever you need to do, do it! Make a plan to make this fear go away so that you can move onwards and upwards!
For example, if you are terrified of having a C-section, why are you so scared of this particular procedure? Is there any medical indication at this stage why this should happen? Let’s say there was a high chance of this due to medical reasons; what would this mean for you in terms of how this differ from a ‘normal’ birth and how would your recovery change? Consider these thoughts:
• What can you do to still make this the happy, peaceful birth you hoped for?
• What would make this situation better and more manageable for you and your baby and your partner?
• What can you do to minimize the chances of this happening at all?